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What has ecology got to do with coaching?

Thu, 28 Jul 2022 09:01:25 GMT

A study of consequences

Ecology in coaching. What do we mean by that? Isn’t ecology all about nature, the planet, the environment etc? Well, yes . . . . . . And no.

When we talk about ecology, we are often talking about ‘consequences.’ In other words, the consequences of our actions AND those of the choices and actions of our client as a result of their interaction with us. Because every action HAS a consequence, whether that be ‘useful’ or unuseful.’ So it is with coaching.

Here’s an example. You are contacted by a potential client. An initial conversation leads you to make a decision - discovery call or not? What’s the consequence of that decision?

You decide on the discovery call and then, in the course of that call, you glean some information about the client that raises a question - is this really a coaching requirement, is it mentoring they need or is it possibly borderline therapy? You have a decision to make - what’s the consequence of that decision?

Y ou decide to take that client on and all is going well. Yet, you are still constantly monitoring your language, your interaction, your ‘attitude’ to the client and their progress.

At some point, the client raises an action they are considering. Listening to that idea, you might ask them to think through the possibilities and consequences thereof. Not to deter them but to ensure they have thought things through thoroughly - that’s part of what you are there for after all, is it not?

At every step of the journey, a professional and ethical coach will be checking for consequence and ensuring their client does the same.

THAT is ecology in coaching.

Some useful questions to ask might include:

If you do that, what’s the best that could happen?
If you do that, what else could happen?
If you don’t do that, what are the possible benefits?
If you don’t do that, what are the possible consequences?
What other options are there? (And repeat the above questions)

So here’s another line of thought:

Are YOU an ecological coach?
What’s the possible consequence of that?

If you'd like to know more about the Association for Professional Coaching and its stance on ethics and ecology, visit our web pages.

Coaching Vs Therapy

Fri, 17 Jun 2022 12:30:57 GMT

Answering that evergreen question

Here is the constantly asked question. Where is the line between coaching and therapy – and can I cross it? The truth is that it’s not a simple question to answer since coaching is, without a doubt, a therapeutic process in and of itself.

Coaching enables the client to determine their own destination, find their own answers, clear their own obstacles, and plot their own course, all whilst taking ownership and responsibility for their own process. There are many types of ‘coach’ from Life Coach to Relationship Coach. In fact, in my experience, if you can think of an activity that a human being engages in, there’s probably someone out there offering to coach it.

So, let’s explore the difference a little. The Therapist, and here I will focus mainly on key areas of therapy such as Counselling and Psychotherapy as there are a great many forms and models of therapy, generally works with their client to deal with the impact of past or present issues, often based in experiences, and with other presenting psychopathologies that can range from stress or anxiety right through to clinical depression and more serious mental health issues. These are highly trained and qualified professionals who have dedicated themselves to their profession and work within the codes of conduct set by various professional bodies within their profession. So, much of the work is focused on present and past.

The Coach, on the other hand, is generally concerned, as I’ve already stated, with moving their client forward, taking ownership and achieving their own goals. Again, the Coach is (or should be) a trained, qualified, and ethical professional who works within the code of conduct of a professional body. The Coach focuses their client on present to future.

Given the difference in qualification and expertise, it is vital that we, as ethical professionals, maintain strict boundaries in our work, operating within our own scope of practice. To this end, I would even advocate a policy of ‘disclosure’ in our initial discovery sessions with potential clients, eliciting any areas that may be of concern. This will enable us to make informed decisions on whether to work with that individual based on ethics and professionalism as well as personal interaction.

In my practice, my own client contract calls for disclosure on present or past psychological support as well as any past or present prescribed medication in support of mental health issues. If either of these raise any concerns at all, I can then follow some options, that may include:

· Seeking further clarification from the client

· Requesting permission to communicate with the client’s medical practitioner/therapist

· Requesting a written agreement from their practitioner/therapist that they are happy for the coaching to proceed

· Consider not going ahead with that client

N one of these are because I’m ‘fussy’ or even over-cautious. They are because I care about the wellbeing of the individual above the needs of my business, and I respect their right to receive the most professional and ethical support available to them.

What it comes down to is to ask yourself, as an ethical professional, three simple questions:

1. Am I really qualified to work with this person?

2. Should I work with this person or refer them on?

3. Do I want to work with this person?

If the answer to any one of these questions is ‘no’ then don’t do it, no matter how tempting, how lucrative or how much you want or need the business.

Y ou can find more on professional conduct by visiting the website of the Association for Professional Coaching on www.theapcinternational.org

The Power of Peer

Fri, 17 Jun 2022 12:30:52 GMT

How can peer groups help coaches bring their best game?

Members of the Association for Professional Coaching understand what it means to use an ethical framework, treat their clients - and each other - with total professionalism and aim to provide a client experience of the highest quality.

One key element in this is a dedication to ongoing skills development through Continuous Professional Development (CPD) and what better way than by forming peer groups. These groups benefit all participants by offering opportunities to:

Practice existing skills
Give and receive high quality feedback
Hod each other accountable
Share thoughts and ideas on new techniques and coaching strategies
Master Minding challenges and obstacles

If you are considering forming a peer group, here are a few thoughts you may wish to bear in mind.

Keep to a manageable size - three to six participants seems to be the most common
No one person constantly 'runs' the group so that ideas flow and responsibility shifts
Meet on a planned, regular basis and keep a record of each session
Set and agree boundaries at the outset in order to maintain professionalism and ethical conduct
Boundaries should include confidentiality, safe-space attitude, a solid feedback model
Have a pre-agreed topic for practice/discussion

When meeting to practice a specific coaching technique or model, agree the structure of the session, ensure all members of the group have an opportunity to practice coaching, being coached and observe/give feedback. This makes the impact of each session far more powerful. Feedback should be given professionally and non-judgementally, accepted in the spirit of learning excellence and a record taken away by the recipient so that they may integrate that feedback into future coaching.

Following these few simple guidelines will help you, as a professional coach, to constantly raise your game and serve your clients at a higher standard.

The Psycholinguistics of Success

Fri, 17 Jun 2022 12:30:17 GMT

The power of language in determining your outcomes

T wenty-five years in a corporate career, followed by twenty years of running my own business as a professional coach, speaker and trainer have taught me a great many lessons. Chief among those lessons, and one that has hit home more and more on my journey from NLP newbie to Master Trainer, is the power of language; power to do great good and, of course, not-so-good.

Psycholinguistics and Neurolinguistics are both branches of the study of language, how we create it and how it affects us at a psychological level. I’ve been fascinated by this, initially from a business perspective – negotiating, coaching, training and speaking – and then, of course, at a holistic level.

Language, both verbal and non-verbal, are critical if we wish to achieve positive outcomes at any level, whether in a business or personal setting. In this short piece, I’d like to share some thoughts on verbal communication. Let’s begin by looking at the communication process from the “inside.”

I magine for a moment that you are sitting in a meeting. It could be a business, social or even family setting. Presupposing that all those sitting around you are in full possession of all their physical faculties (sight, hearing, speech), there is an unconscious process running in the mind of each person. That process goes something like this:

All of the senses are used to take in everything that’s going on – speech, gestures, movements, expressions, surrounding ambient sounds, temperature, sights etc. So, five senses on full alert and taking in (according to many specialists) over two million bits of information in every second. Yes, I said TWO MILLION. That is far too much for us to process at a conscious level. In fact, we can actually consciously only process less than TEN bits so the vast majority of the communication AND everything else is being “filtered” at an unconscious level. And that, right there, is where things can go awry.

The first filter to impact is words and language. The words that we use have meaning specific to US and not necessarily the same meaning to others. For example, take the word “education.” When I recently asked a group of ten people to write down the three things that this simple everyday word meant to them, I got a range of answers and no one answer common to all ten. So many misunderstandings and even confrontations are caused by individual interpretation.

O ur second filter is created by our beliefs . These are things we hold to be true about ourselves, others or the world in general and often based on personal experience or what I call “third party experience” – media reports, word of mouth etc. They are, all too often, gross generalisations and we all have the capacity to do it. I used to hear comments like, “Well, you would say that; you’re a salesman and all salesmen lie.” A belief that filters communication and causes the listener to make an unuseful assumption.

N ext comes the deeper filter of our personal Values . Since our Values drive pretty much all of our behaviour, they are often “languaged” in our communication and will also filter what we see and hear. Have you ever had a conversation with somebody and felt uncomfortable because of something they’ve said, or the way in which they’ve said it? That is often because they’ve said something that has conflicted with one of our Values – often at a very subtle level.

Add to this cocktail our individual “perception filters” (referred to in the world of NLP as Meta Programmes) of which there are many, and you can see that a simple conversation can be a real minefield.

So, how do we navigate our way through that minefield? Here are a few tips that may be helpful:

People are different. That’s a fact. They have different beliefs, experiences, opinions, hopes and fears. They have their own “model of the world” and respecting that fact, accepting them for what they are, is a big step in the right direction. My favourite saying there is, “he’s not mad, sad, bad or broken. He’s just different to me.”

Listen with the intention of understanding and not simply so you can respond. If necessary, ask questions in order to ensure clarity.

Accept responsibility for your communication and their understanding. It’s YOUR job to help them understand what you mean and not to simply throw it out there and make it their responsibility to unpick your meaning.

People are who they are in the moment and so current personal experiences may impact on their behaviour and their filters. In other words, a bad experience may cause them to filter your words in an unuseful way. So, be doubly watchful.

T here is no substitute for “clean” language. By this I mean self-editing your own language. Use words like BUT, TRY and DON’T only as appropriate because they have a very real impact on the listener at an unconscious level .

So, something you can begin right now is to listen to yourself and edit your own language.

Remember, relationships are about communication. Business is about communication. LIFE is about communication. Communication is about language and its interpretation.

I wish you great success with your communication.

Everyone needs a coach

Fri, 17 Jun 2022 12:29:32 GMT

Coaching is for everyone, not just the few

M ost organisations of any size provide opportunities for their managers to build and develop their skills through training of some description. This is often a challenge for smaller businesses and even more so for the many solo enterprises where time, money and options are far more limited.

Still, the fact is that we cannot develop our business if we do not develop ourselves and it goes beyond physical skills and strategies. Those skills and strategies will bring a limited return on investment if we do not develop at a mental, emotional and possibly even spiritual level.

Aptitude will never increase whilst attitudes remain the same

So, what can be done about this? My answer is to approach it in two phases:

First, invest in yourself through carefully selected training. This doesn’t have to be about extensive in-house or open programmes but can include participation in shorter presentations, industry-specific conferences, high quality webinars and online programmes that can be timed to suit a busy personal schedule and even the tightest of budgets.

A nd go beyond the usual skills development such as leadership, team building, communication, presenting, sales etc. Dig deeper and look at developing YOU as a person, increasing your self-awareness, your emotional management, your inner strengths and mindset .

S econd, and of equally high importance, is to get yourself a coach . Everyone inbusiness, at every level, needs a coach. A good professional coach will help and support you in a number of ways:

· Developing your skills through feedback and objective questioning

· Providing a sounding board for your ideas and innovations

· Offering specific guidance where appropriate

· Helping you develop deeper self-awareness

· Assisting you in developing or changing your business strategies

· Putting that training into high impact effectiveness

A good professional coach is going to become a silent partner in your endeavours and will help you achieve a level of performance AND self awareness that you may never achieve without.

So, whatever your position and whatever your organisation, remember:

There can be no real professional development without personal development